not to be that person actually but. please reblog so we can have legs
hitting reblog, head in hands, the sigh heard round the world
Your penis has become erect. Use the stone on it to return it to normal.
intermission? oh boy I can't wait to go get some more food and stretch my le-
who is he.
something true and beautiful. please
they should invent a cig break for people who don't smoke
ALTI told my boss I was going for a fag break, but didn't say any more. Not my fault if they misunderstand.
4yo: actually, my dad work for nike
Me: my dad works for dinosaur
4yo: (very skeptic but doesn't have the words to call me out) tell me what... is the... dinosaurs name😑
Constantly seeking stimulation to avoid going insane and wanting to die
cashiers don’t actually care what you buy you could buy a fork a toaster and a bath plug and i wouldnt notice all i’m thinking abt is “in five min it will be one hour until two hours before i can go home”
